Transactional Love

 

When I was a kid, it seemed the adults in my life - my teachers, church people, and, sadly, sometimes my parents - liked me more when I was good. I get it. Who wants bad behavior? I learned that if I could bring myself to sit still, stay quiet, and wait to pass notes when my teacher was at the chalkboard, everything went more smoothly.

We didn’t learn better behavior, just better tactics. When I hit the mark, I didn’t feel like such a nuisance. I felt like I was wanted. And I wanted to feel wanted. Who doesn’t?

That pressure to perform… It wasn’t intended this way, but these things confirm our biggest fears:

In this world that we are not loved for who we are but for what we do, how we act, how things appear.

We’re loved if we make life easier for the people around us. We are loved as long as we hide our mistakes. We are loved as long as we’re not an inconvenience. This is transactional love: we secure it as long as we hold up our end of the deal.

Here’s the thing: God said we are loved and belong because we were born. See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! 1 John 3:1

God says it doesn’t matter whether we lose the game with a strikeout or hit it out of the park for the win - we are loved. He’s not keeping score in the game because in Christ He already secured the win for eternity.

God doesn’t want us to just behave better. He wants us to be transformed into His likeness. Now go and sin no more.

Question: What would change if you believed what God said about you?